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seven moons, eternal nights

i’ve been violently thrown out in the ocean, and the way i fell wasn’t the most pleasant one; not like i’m not used to the friction of water when i decide to canon-ball into a pool, but this time it was an ocean. it’s completely different from a simple pool you have in your backyard. it was scary, it made me feel like i didn’t know the way back home. it made me question myself over and over again, and i started doubting my own ability to swim back to the shore. but i did, i forced myself to keep swimming even if my lungs were already being filled with water; it hurt, for it’s salty, and my lungs weren’t made for that but oxygen. only oxygen.

yet i ventured out there in the sea, swam with fishes and saw the ones that are just so hidden in the depths of the vast ocean that it’s quite impossible to put in words how magnificent they are. and they exist—even though we can’t always see them. they are all there, living their fishy lives, minding their own business.

beautiful. disturbing. hypnotizing.

the way back home was rocky, windy, and i shivered and starved because it suddenly felt as if i was an infant with no place to go. i have a mother, i have a father, i have siblings, i have a family—so why do i feel so alone? why do i feel so lost and so hopeless?

i sighed, shook myself, waited in the sun to dry out, walked some more. noticed places i haven’t seen before, smiled at people i’ve never smiled before, looked at both sides before crossing the street, ate more than i could, slept more than i should, cried just enough; enough to make me realize that despite foxes being great swimmers, they should stick with heir feet on the ground. go on and dig a trash, bite someone’s hands if they try to pet you, laugh uncontrollably because something about it is just so fun.

live, little fox
even if you feel lost
but keep your feet on the ground;

you’ll find yourself pretty soon—
within yourself.